The Importance of a Good News File
I'd love to tell you that being in seminary and working in a church is always easy and fun, that I am confident in everything I am doing in my vocation, and that I am 100% certain that I am doing the right thing with my life.
But those would be lies.
Let me be clear: I have a lot of fun working at my church! I have friends there who make me laugh, who are a joy to work with, and who often do make my job easier. There are some times I am confident in what I am doing, and there are some events that I pull off as a youth director that I think are successful. And there are glimpses, every now and then, that I am doing the right thing.
However, I'm human - and that means there are some really hard days. Some days, church work isn't easy. There are probably more days than I'd like to admit where I don't know what the hell I'm doing, that I barely get by with a prayer and the grace of God. I dig myself into holes sometimes academically that I think I'll never climb out of. And there are many days I'm wondering if I'm doing the right thing, wondering why I ever left a secure job working as a public school teacher, wondering if there's any way God can use a regular woman like me to do anything for the kindom.*
Those days are the reason I keep a Good News File. I actually have two - one hanging in my church office, and another one hanging in my office at home.
Today after church, I received an email from two church members. It is probably the most encouraging and supportive email I've ever received in my life. In it, the church members thanked me for a sermon I preached about a month ago - how this sermon has made an impact in their lives - and affirmed my place in the ministry. This email described my voice as powerful and impactful. It made me teary-eyed as I read it sitting in a restaurant.
After I got home, I answered with so much gratitude. Then I printed it off. And I placed it in my Good News File.
So what's in my Good News File?
- affirming and postive emails
- cards and sweet notes that have been sent to me in the mail or stuck under my office door
- seminary papers I've written with encouraging remarks from professors (Columbia Theological Seminary folks, I've kept every single paper I've written for Dr. William Yoo - that man can affirm your writing like no other person I know!)
- pictures, trinkets, and drawings I've gotten from family members and from children
- bulletins from events I'm proud of
On days when I feel as though I don't know what I'm doing, on days that I doubt myself and my call to ministry, on days that are hard - I go to my Good News File and I pull something out to read. Sometimes I pull out a few things to read. And I am reminded that God has indeed called me into this wild and wondrous ministry life, and that though days can be hard and discouraging, God is with me all along the way. All of the items in this bag remind me of that good and wonderful news. And it is these precious reminders from my family, my friends, my colleagues, and my church members that help me remember that.
This is why I keep a Good News File.
And if you ever have days that are discouraging, confusing, or downright depressing - I suggest you start a Good News File too. Let me know if you decide to start one. I'd love to send you something to help you fill it up.
*While most folks are familiar with the term kingdom of God, I like to use the term kindom. It sounds less like government and more like family. For me, it's less about boundaries that keep people out, but more like a big hug that brings people in. Kindom is inclusive. Kindom is welcoming. Kindom is loving. I often use "kingdom" when I preach and write liturgy because that's a term that most people understand. In my writing here, you'll see me use kindom to refer to all of us gathered in God's deep and abiding love.